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14 definitions by Franklin Delano Roosevelt

 
1.
Fat Joe is the only non-black person in the universe who isn't called a racist by saying "muh niggas". Fat Joe is the love child of Porky Pig and Jennifer Lopez. He is perhaps the ugliest human alive, yet we love him because he is obese... as long as he's at a safe distance from us and our dinner plates.
"I can't look at Fat Joe because it makes me want to yank my eyes out and rub icy hot on my crotch"
or
"Fat Joe is SOOOO cute! I'd totally fuck him, hes a teddy bear!"
ayon kay Franklin Delano Roosevelt ika-20 ng Disyembre, 2004
 
2.
The greatest Jewish comedian alive? Uh, quite possibly! Not... Uh derp!
"Heh-heh, Rob Schneider was an animal. Then he was a woman. And now, Rob Schneider is -- A STAPLER! And he's about to find out -- that being a stapler -- is harder than it looks! Rob Schneider is -- THE STAPLER! Rated PG-13."

"Heh-heh, Rob Schneider is a Wall Street executive, with everything going for him. Only problem is -- he's about to become -- A CARROT! It's 24-carrot comedy! Rob Schneider is -- A CARROT! Rated PG-13."

"Heh-heh, Rob Schneider, derp dee derp! Derp dee derpittee derpee derp! Until one day, a derpa derpa durba derp! Derp dee derp, -- da teetley tum! From the creators of -- DER -- and -- TUM TA TITTALY TUM TERPA DERP, Rob Schneider is -- DA DERP DEE DERP DA TEETLEY DERPEE DERPEE DUMB. Rated PG-13."
ayon kay Franklin Delano Roosevelt ika-29 ng Disyembre, 2004
 
3.
Three Dollars and fifty cents.
Chef's dad: Ooh! It must've been about seven, eight years ago. Me and the little lady was out on this
boat you see, all alone at night, when all of a sudden this huge creature, this giant crustacean from the
paleolithic era, comes out of the water
Chef's mom: We was so scared, Lord have mercy, I jumped up in the boat and I said "Thomas, what on
earth is that creature?!"
Chef's dad: It stood above us looking down with these big red eyes...
Chef's mom: Oh it was so scary!
Chef's dad: And I yelled, I said "What do you want from us monster?!" And the monster bent down and
said "I need about treefiddy"
silence
Kyle: What's treefiddy?
Chef's dad: Three dollars and fifty cents
Chef's mom: Treefiddy
Stan: He wanted money?
Chef's dad: That's right. I said "I ain't giving you no treefiddy you goddam Loch Ness monster! Get your
own goddam money!"
Chef's mom: I gave him a dollar
Chef's dad: She gave him a dollar
Chef's mom: I thought he'd go away if I gave him a dollar
Chef's dad: Well of course he's not gonna go away, Ne! You gave him a dollar, he's gonna assume you got
more
ayon kay Franklin Delano Roosevelt ika-14 ng Disyembre, 2004
 
4.
Town in southeastern Pennsylvania located about 20 miles east of Philly. The Borough of Malvern is home to 3,500 geriatrics who all go to 1 pharmacy, 1 convenience store, and 47 antique stores. The borough is about 1 square mile but all the business is located in one half, the blacks have their section and the rich have their place (though they seem to be taking over the black sections). People think they are from Malvern, but most are retards because Malvern mailing address is the size of Cuba. Also sometimes referred to as bumblefuck, PA
1. "We're rich and Catholic! Let's move to Malvern"
2. "We're black and Baptist! Let's move out of Malvern"
3. "We're old! Let's die in Malvern"
Uh, DERP!
ayon kay Franklin Delano Roosevelt ika-20 ng Disyembre, 2004
 
5.
1. Meteorologist on the Delaware Valley's channel 10 NBC news. He makes promotional commercials featuring his mom and he enjoys a super silly bow tie now and again... or everyday.

2. Someone who makes up innaccurate information for a living, while looking like a douche doing it.
1. Hurricane Schwartz just made a cheeky joke about precipitation. Oh Hurricane!

2. Meteorologists, lawyers, and catholic priests are all considered hurricane schwartzes
ayon kay Franklin Delano Roosevelt ika-08 ng Marso, 2005
 
6.
Abbreviation of cankles.
An ebonics phrase used by black folk (or people who believe that they too, are black)to describe the fatty build up around the lower area of their legs. You see, little one, the morbidly obese have no differentiation between their calves and ankles, therefore "CANKLES" or CANKS for short.
M-giggly: B-doc, you can't wear those flood pants when we go to the carnival!
B-Doc: Well Why the jizzle-dizzle not?
M-giggly: your canks be showin! youz nasty! Im gonna get me some watermelon and biscuits!
ayon kay Franklin Delano Roosevelt ika-20 ng Disyembre, 2004
 
7.
Located in southeastern Pennsylvania, Great Valley High School is best known for the Mad Dumper: A student who believes in the beauty of the fecal matter he expunges from his sphinctor. Rubbing it all over the walls of school, this heroe has brought forth a better understanding of our true selves and reminds us of the age old question: Why does corn stick to my doo-doo?
"The Mad Dumper struck again! There is poo all over the boy's bathroom. I swear to God, I think it was Rita Jones" -Billy Ray Cyrus (GVHS class of 2002)
ayon kay Franklin Delano Roosevelt ika-14 ng Disyembre, 2004